Thoughts of Broken Feelings
by LadyShiva89
Summary: My first fanfic GinXRangiku... Please read! and review


My first ever fan fic! I'm not that good at writing but I hope you like it :)

Rangiku and Gin are my favorite bleach couple so I thought I'd try to write something about them so...

enjoy!

By the way...I don't own bleach!

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**Thoughts of Broken Feelings**

It was past midnight. Almost all the lights in sierietie were out. He was making his way through the dark alleys to her room. Why? He wasn't sure himself. Maybe, because he wanted to see her. Maybe, because he needed her. And maybe, just maybe, because the thin trail of blood he was leaving on the ground behind him, was getting thicker. Maybe… She was the only one he could trust…The only one.

He reached the door to her room. **_She's probably asleep,_ _maybe I shouldn't wake her… _**She opened her eyes at the sudden feeling of his reatsu. She turned around to face the door. _**Why is he here? And why now?** _She sat on her bed. He was standing in the door way.

_"Hello, Rangiku"_

It was dark and she could barely see his face, but she knew he was smiling. He's always smiling… he started to walk towards her.

_"Gin, what are you…"_

She was cut off by the sight of his blood soaked figure as he walked by the window. She could clearly see the crimson covering his face in the moonlight.

_"Gin!"_

She cried in fear, as she ran to him.

"What happened? Who did this to you?"

She looked at his face, he was still smiling.

_"Gin!" _

She said in a slightly angry voice.

_"It's nothing"_

His voice was calm. Too calm, considering his condition. _**There's no use, he wasn't gonna tell her anything. He never does**!_

_"Gin…"_

She said in a sad, almost broken voice. Tears were starting to fill her eyes. She didn't want him to see her crying. She turned away and went to get some bandages to fix his wounds.

When she got back, he was sitting on the floor, his taichou uniform lying beside him. She kneeled down in front of him, and helped him take off his shirt. He had a terrible wound in his chest, and he could see the worried look in her sky-blue eyes when she saw it. **_It was made by a sword…But whose sword? And why?_** She took a wet rag and cleaned his wound. It hurt a little but he didn't care. She bandaged it and went to tend the one on his forehead. She slightly pulled his head toward her so she could get a better look at the wound. It wasn't that deep but it was still bleeding.

She moved a few strands of his silver, now a bit red, hair that were covering the wound. He could feel her warm breath on his forehead as she wiped the blood from his face. This is the closest they have gotten in a long time. _**His fault, maybe?...no. surly his fault. He's the one who shut her out… He's** **the one who drifted away.**_

She finished tending to his wound, and turned to pick up the unused bandages beside her.

_"Been a long time, hasn't it…Rangiku?"_

_"What has?"_

She answered, without turning to face him.

_"Since we've been alone together"_

She looked at him. He wasn't smiling, for a change, and his eyes were wide open. It's been a while since she's seen those eyes. Those red, frightening, yet somehow… gentle, eyes. He was looking at her. She could see the passion, the desire, in his eyes and it made her feel a bit nervous. She bit her lip and looked away. Without any warning he pulled her to him and kissed her. She didn't pull back, or struggle, in fact she kissed him back.

_**He knew he shouldn't have kissed her. He knew he's only hurting her. But he couldn't help it. He wanted her…He needed her…Probably as much as she needed him.**_

She ran her fingers through his hair and brought their bodies even closer together.

**_She knew she shouldn't be doing this, but she didn't care. She missed him…She missed this. Being with him, being close to him… This is all she cared about. Right now, this is all she wanted._**

They were lying naked in her bed. She put her head on his chest and he ran his hand through her hair. There was a long silence between them and she was the first to break it.

_"Ne, Gin?"_

_"What is it?"_

He said, still playing with her hair.

_"Why wont you tell me what's going on with you?"_

He stopped playing with her hair. He stayed quiet for a few seconds, considering whether to answer her question or not.

_"Because I don't want you to hurt anymore"_

**_Oh Gin…don't you get it? It hurts more not knowing. It hurts more seeing you like this… Why won't you tell me? Why won't you let me help you? I don't understand Gin…I just don't understand… _**

She started to cry. She just couldn't stop the tears from falling down her face.** _He was_**_ **always making her cry. Always…**_His chest was getting wet from her tears.** _He didn't like it when she cried._**

_"Crying, are we?"_

He lifted her head so he could see her face. He had a serious look on his face, something you don't see very often. He gently wiped the tears away from her eyes.

_"Don't cry Rangiku…I'm here now"_

He hugged her really tight. _**Yeah…You're here now…But for how long? **_She smiled, sadly, and fell asleep in his arms. _**I'm sorry Rangiku. There are things I just can't tell you. I hope someday you'll understand. **_

The next morning when she woke up, he wasn't there. He was already gone. **_She wasn't surprised…He never stays for long. He never stays long enough... _**The bed beside her, where he slept, was still warm. He probably left a short while ago. She got up to collect her cloths. They were scattered all over the floor. She noticed there were still a few drops of blood on the floor where he sat last night. **_"Because I don't want you to hurt anymore"…Gin…You're such an idiot._**

The day passed by slowly. She tried to do her paper work, to get her mind off things, but she couldn't stop thinking about him. **_Where was he now? What was he doing? _**She was almost done with her paper work when Hitsugaya walked in. When he saw her working he looked shocked. After all she wasn't the type to sit down and do her paper work when she was supposed to.

_"Matsomoto?"_

She looked up at him surprised. She was so deep in thought that she didn't even notice him coming.

_"Taichou! When did you come in?"_

_"Are you feeling alright?"_

He said as he walked into the office.

_"Um…Yeah. I guess"_

She collected the papers in front of her to a pile. She seemed troubled.

_"It's just… You don't usually do your paper work"_

He picked up a few papers from the pile she made. They were all finished. He looked back at her.

_"Are you sure your o.k.?"_

_"I said I'm fine!"_

**_But was she, really?_**

_"Besides, you're the one who's always bugging me to do my paper work"_

He sighed. **_It's true. He did… But still,_** **_he knew she wasn't fine. _**

_"Matsomoto!"_

He protested, but she was already up and starting to leave the room. She paused in the doorway.

_"Don't worry taichou. I'll be fine. Really"_

She gave him a tired smile and left. **_He was worried about her, but she couldn't tell him what was wrong. She couldn't tell him about gin… He wouldn't understand. _**

She rolled over in her bed. She couldn't sleep. Every time she tried to close her eyes she saw his face. She still couldn't stop thinking about him. **_She hasn't seen him all day. Was he really o.k.? What if he got hurt again? _**She sighed and lifted herself up. She got out of bed and went outside. She closed the door behind her and started walking.

It was past midnight. There was a full moon in the sky. She was making her way to his room. Why? She wasn't sure herself. Maybe, because she wanted to see him. Maybe, because she needed him. And maybe, just maybe, because the thin trail of blood she is always leaving on the ground behind her, gets thicker when they're apart. Maybe…He was the only one she could trust… The only one.

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Please review:)


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